We Paid a $50K Nonrefundable Deposit on a New Home. Then My Husband Gambled Away $121K Day Trading and Put the House in Jeopardy

A couple thought they were in a strong position to buy their next home. They earned about $240,000 a year, had sold their previous townhouse and had already put down a $50,000 nonrefundable deposit on a $550,000 house. Then the wife discovered that $121,000 they were counting on was gone.

Kate, a 40-year-old caller from Indiana, told “The Ramsey Show” recently that her husband had lost the money day trading. Worse, she said he had repeatedly assured her that it was safely invested in stocks and cryptocurrency.

“He did lie about that,” she said. “And it’s not the first time we lost money in the past.”

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The $121K Wasn’t the First Loss

The couple had agreed to put 20% down on their new home, with her husband free to invest the remaining money. Instead, Kate said, he began day trading without telling her.

And this wasn’t an isolated disaster. She said her 43-year-old husband had previously lost about $50,000, along with other losses totaling tens of thousands of dollars.

He also has about $20,000 in personal and credit card debt and another $127,000 in business loans, according to Kate. Their finances had already been separated because he sometimes failed to make payments, leaving her to cover them.

When Kate explained that those debt figures were based on what her husband had told her, co-host George Kamel wasn’t satisfied.

“I’m not going off of what he tells you anymore,” he said, advising her to pull reports from all three credit bureaus to determine whether there was more debt she didn’t know about.

The immediate question, however, was what to do about the house. With the $121,000 gone, the couple could be facing a mortgage of roughly half a million dollars. Her husband insisted he would handle the payments and their other expenses, but Kate said the numbers simply didn’t work. She expected they would even have to move their two children from private to public school.

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For anyone facing a major financial decision without knowing whether the numbers really add up, Advisor.com aims to make professional guidance easier to access. Its roughly five-minute matching quiz connects you with vetted fiduciaries based on your financial needs. Those professionals help with areas including budgeting, taxes and estate planning, and once you find the right fit, you can book their services right away.

Losing the Deposit May Be the Cheaper Option

The hosts were far more concerned about the pattern behind the missing money than the house itself.

“The house is the least of your problems at this point,” Kamel told Kate.

Kate said her husband doesn’t believe he has a gambling problem. In his view, he invested and failed. The couple had also tried marriage counseling, but after one session, Kate said her husband didn’t like it and refused to continue.

“He’s choosing his gambling addiction over his family at this point,” Kamel said. “He’s opting out of the marriage.”

“I probably would not go through with buying a house with him right now,” co-host Rachel Cruze added.

She suggested contacting the lender and carefully reviewing the purchase contract to see whether there was any way to walk away.

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That could mean sacrificing the entire $50,000 deposit. But Kamel argued that losing another $50,000 now could be less damaging than continuing to tie their finances together while her husband’s behavior remains unchanged.

“He’s done more stupid tax in the last year than that $50K deposit you would lose,” he said. “And he’ll continue to do it if we don’t put an end to this.”

Kate was also encouraged to protect her income, establish clear financial boundaries and seek counseling herself. If her husband wanted the marriage to continue, Kamel said he should also be assessed by a gambling addiction specialist.

Not everyone can get personalized advice from “The Ramsey Show.” Advisor.com can connect you with a vetted fiduciary who can look at your finances and help you figure out your next move.

Image: Shutterstock

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